Be constructive

Let all things be done for edification. 1 Corinthians 14:26

Edification: the instruction or improvement of a person morally or intellectually.

Humans actions has two consequences: or purposes: constructive, or destructive

Evil spirit produces destructive behavior

Holy or good spirit produces constructive behavior

Everyone has both

Don’t breed evil spirit.

The evil spirit inside yourself.

The evil spirit inside your house.

The evil spirit inside your community.

Destructive behavior can breed evil spirit.

So, it’s a bad loop.

Destructive behavior brings pain to other people.

And pain can likely trigger resentment and anger.

Forgiveness is constructive.

Patience is constructive.

Love is constructive.

Hope is constructive.

Faith is constructive.

And constructive behavior is love.

Work is constructive.

A man strengthen himself by working.

Constructive work.

But human sin enjoys destructive work. Like the scene in Pinocchio.

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emotion都是暂时的,consequences是持久的

无论是痛苦,激动,伤心,愧疚,喜悦,过去的感受都无法重新再次感受

但是场景,行为,后果,这些发生了的事情,似乎能够持久存留

而emotion经常会lead to stupid decision

比如报复,自残

所以,人需要学会如何conquer the pathway to destructive action

也许这就是所谓的情商?或者是逆商?

如何培养小孩这种逆商呢?

reward for constructive action?

那么,又有什么样的逆境呢?

失败?不如别人?rejection?

毛豆毛的生气

上个周日,毛豆豆感冒还没好,很犹豫要不要带他去教会

我就问他

他说不想去

毛豆毛在一旁,突然就很生气

大声指责弟弟,感冒也得去的!我感冒都上学的!

我让毛毛出去,我说我来跟弟弟说

毛毛出门,狠狠的摔了一下门

一股无名怒火烧到我的脑袋,我恨不得拿起手机使劲的砸门

后来出来以后,我仍然非常生气

我跟毛毛说,你是不是觉得unfair

毛毛说是

我说,行,你今天别去了,在家呆着,我带豆豆去,这样fair了吧

毛毛说,不行!

我说你不是说unfair吗?

我一个劲儿的说她。后来压制住脾气,带了他俩去教会。

昨天下午回来,我急着要让豆豆做一个中文作业,就几分钟可以弄完

豆豆不愿意弄

我说first thing first。中文作业很important。

豆豆说不important。

讲道理也没用。豆豆就拿个小车在桌子上摆弄

我又有些着急了。

我很想让豆豆完成中文作业,我说你可以选择现在几分钟弄完,然后好好去玩。或者选择一个劲儿在这儿磨叽,等会儿爸爸发脾气。

这时毛豆豆更着急了。

她生气的冲豆豆大叫:“你赶快做中文作业!要不然爸爸又生气了!我也在做中文作业!我还得打字呢!”

那一瞬间,我意识到毛毛就像我的一面镜子。哎。。。

我这个老爸真是失败。。。

豆豆的眼圈也开始红了。

我于心不忍。想想算了,他不做就不做了吧。

但是心里还是有些生气。就继续干我工作上的事情。

后来听见豆豆姥姥跟豆豆说,你是不是困了?

豆豆点头说是。

我才意识到他可能累了。

我说你去睡觉吧。他很开心。

要去沙发。我说你上楼吧。

他走了两步,又回来。说想上沙发上睡。

我说楼下这么多人,你能睡着吗?

他说能。

我想了想,觉得他可能害怕一个人在楼上。就同意让他在沙发上睡。

他快速跑到沙发上,很快就睡着了。

哎。。。

以前经常晚上给他做作业,他也是慢,迟钝,不长记性。老打哈欠。我总是着急。可能他其实是真的困了,需要休息。

毛豆语录

开学第一个礼拜

开车送毛豆豆到学校

下车的时候,我照常说,快点儿,小巴比

毛豆豆很不高兴的对我说

不要叫我小!也不要叫我比!

我说,那我叫你什么呢?

叫毛豆豆啊?

可以!

//另外,毛豆豆这几天又感冒了。咳嗽厉害。

关于权健

A few questions

Why it’s so successful?

1. 普通民众会买他们的产品。

购买是基于Trust。Or. Faith and Hope.

那么普通民众为什么会相信?

The logos of truth is overwhelmed by logos of lies.

Propaganda of lies are pushed by money, corrupted power.

Truth also needs power to promote.

There are different powers.

Legislative power, executive power, interpretation power.

But the fourth power is the strongest, that’s media power.

And thanks to social media, truth is able to spread faster than before.

2. 为什么会有这么多人加入传销队伍。

There is some positive feeebacks. Pyramid scheme is the key.

Why pyramid scheme is so powerful?

Because people trust the story. It’s simple, easy to understand and there are many witnesses.

When people is obsessed with money, they tend to over estimate the speed to success. Or, under estimate the cost. Moreover, they believe they can success in the future even when they lost in near term.

The stream of success stories will keep washing your brain, enforce your belief system. And human are thirst for success.

乱七八糟

最近老婆不在家,有时holiday season,小孩活动多

所以有更多时间陪毛豆

虽然平时毛豆都是人家眼里的天使宝贝,但是这几天注意到了几个问题

前天跟leon家玩

leon是豆豆的好朋友

毛毛没有专门的玩伴

在creativity museum几个人各玩各的,还不错

后来吃了饭,去游乐场玩

豆豆跟leon一溜烟就跑掉了

毛毛追也追不上,就很生气,跟我说豆豆不管她,也不跟她玩

后来三个人一起玩滑梯,玩起来了,毛毛也不抱怨了

但是还是出状况了

leon让我tag他们

leon和豆豆在滑梯顶上

我说我不能上去

毛毛让我守住滑梯下面

说她上去tag他们

她到了上面,leon也不知道她要tag他

毛毛就很轻易的tag了leon一下

然后leon就要反过来tag她

毛毛就逃

leon还是tag到她了

毛毛正好不小心下楼梯没踩对

整个屁股坐下来,从一个三四级的台阶下滑下去了,估计屁股被顶得不轻

我看到她表情不对,匆忙跑下来

我报住她,说刚才是不是摔到了

她开始哭,然后生气,说leon推她了

我安慰她

她看到leon从身边跑过去的时候,一下子来了劲儿

追过去使劲打了一下leon

我很生气,使劲拍了一下毛毛

又抱着她,她哭闹着要回家

说不想被人看到红眼圈

唉。当时心力憔悴,恨不得以后不再带他们出来玩了。

安慰了许久,又给她擦了擦眼睛。

又教训了她。

后来她心情平复下来。觉得自己做的不对,专门又跑去给leon道歉,还画了个贺卡送给leon。

昨天接毛毛豆豆从朋友家回来

他们和sarah还有lucy玩life game

豆豆好像玩的不好,是最后一名,出门就开始眼眶湿润,说自己最后,然后开始啜泣

开车回到家,正好碰到壮壮家也回到家,豆豆兴奋的从车里出去,毛毛却不出来,我也不知道为什么。

后来我把车停下。我把毛毛叫出来,要一起去迎接豆豆家。

毛毛说星期六sarah去开party,为什么我们没去!

我没放心上,跟壮壮他们打招呼

毛毛就从后面过来打了我一下,又问了我一遍

我一下子怒火中烧

我说他们应该是中文学校party,sarah妈妈是中文老师,我和妈妈都不是!

哎。。。

毛毛其实还是很容易受伤。豆豆也是。可怎么搞?

乱七八糟

Responsibility is power. It brings meaning, and motivation. It can help you to overcome suffering. It drives you to sacrifice.

Knowledge is power. Higher power doesn’t nessecery need more storage. Alphago neural nets has higher power than others, but model size is small, highly condensed. It has knowledge closer to truth. So, closer to truth is very important. That’s why you always need to pursue truth. You are gaining more power.

Goal bings responsibility, gives meaning, but is also dangerous. Because it has risk of failing. Can you tolerate failure? If not, you have risk of lose meaning and killing yourself. So, have a goal, but also prepare for failure. Prepare for second road. Aim high, but OK to fail. OK to get impact results. Don’t be ashamed if you fail.

Stable is better than instability in general. Stable small gain is better than quick big gain and quick big loss. So don’t be greedy. It introduce instability.

grow

升到5后,老板和老板的老板在不同时段提到我需要grow其他人

于是最近对grow产生了兴趣

不是grow自己,而是grow别人

g很看重grow

提供各种各样的资源grow

比如网课,比如mentor

其实教养孩子也就是grow他们

有一个基本原则就是你不要帮他们把所有事情都做了

要给他们responsibilities,给他们ownership,让他们自己去drive一些projects

别人多做些东西,你也可以少做些东西

不仅如此,别人还grow了,可以帮你做更多的东西

在家里也一样,毛毛不用我们帮忙带隐形眼镜,真是省了不少事儿

毛毛说,我还可以帮助豆豆数学作业,中文作业

真是个省心的孩子

还有什么原则呢?

debug tool and investigation

world are complex

everything can easily become complex

and not transparent

like human illness

like software crashing

something wrong but we cannot see

to fix it, we need to understand

to understand, we need to look inside

to look inside, we need to investigate

to investigate, we need tool

a tool to visualize what happened inside

it’s vision, deep vision.